Parashat Re'eh - Seeing Is Believing

רְאֵ֗ה אָנֹכִ֛י נֹתֵ֥ן לִפְנֵיכֶ֖ם הַיּ֑וֹם בְּרָכָ֖ה וּקְלָלָֽה׃

When paying attention to the grammar in this pasuk, you will notice something strange. Hashem tells the Jewish people “See (Re’eh) I am setting before you, on this day, blessings and curses.” The word Re’eh, to see, is a verb, but written in singular form. But then Hashem says (see) “before you,” which is in plural. Why the discrepancy? Perhaps a more basic question is why the need for the word Re’eh altogether? If you give someone a present, is it necessary to tell him, “look, I am giving you a present?” Isn’t that self evident?

Rabbi Frand in his book on the Parasha (volume 1) suggests an insightful perspective. He says that blessings are not always so obvious. We have to make an effort to see the blessings in our lives, to really perceive their depth. If we don’t look carefully, we can easily overlook the blessings we have been given. So Hashem is reminding us to “see” the blessings He has bestowed upon us. This should help us realize that our lives are full of blessings. Life is a blessing, our family is a blessing no matter how big or how small it is. We have so much that we often take things for granted.

The Kotzker Rebbe says that while one can give out blessings to multiple people at once, each individual will perceive it differently, in his own unique way. Each person’s outlook and personality impact how he views the blessing. So the lesson of this pasuk is that while blessings can be universal, the perception of those blessings is always individual. Hashem uses plural of “before you” in the plural to teach us that while that blessing might have been universal, offered to many, He uses the singular “see” to teach us that how we perceive the blessings is always individual.

Let us learn this lesson and constantly look to “see” the blessings in our lives. Let us not overlook them, not take them for granted, and not fail to thank Hashem on a daily basis for all the blessings He has bestowed upon us.

Parashat Eikev - What is Fear?

Judaism teaches us that all is in the hands of G-d. Well, almost everything. The Gemara in Brachot (33b) teaches הכל בידי שמים – חוץ מיראת שמים - all is in the hands of Hashem except for our fear or awe of Hashem; that remains in our hands. This idea is learned from this week’s Parasha, when it says, 

וְעַתָּה֙ יִשְׂרָאֵ֔ל מָ֚ה יְהוָ֣ה אֱלֹהֶ֔יךָ שֹׁאֵ֖ל מֵעִמָּ֑ךְ כִּ֣י אִם־לְ֠יִרְאָה אֶת־יְהוָ֨ה אֱלֹהֶ֜יךָ לָלֶ֤כֶת בְּכָל־דְּרָכָיו֙ וּלְאַהֲבָ֣ה אֹת֔וֹ וְלַֽעֲבֹד֙ אֶת־יְהוָ֣ה אֱלֹהֶ֔יךָ בְּכָל־לְבָבְךָ֖ וּבְכָל־נַפְשֶֽׁךָ׃

And now, O Israel, what does the LORD your God demand of you? Only this: to revere the LORD your God, to walk only in His paths, to love Him, and to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and soul.

It seems that the pasuk is teaching us that fear of Hashem is the one thing Hashem asks of us and if we fear him, that will lead us to follow in His ways. In other words, the goal is for us to follow in the way of Hashem and the mechanism to get there is fear of Hashem. If this is true, it behooves us to explore what fear of Hashem means.

On one level, fear of Hashem means what we learn in elementary school; that Hashem is watching our every action, He knows everything we do, and there will be punishment if we sin. This fear is purely about keeping us away from sin. But that does not seem to be all. Afterall, our pasuk taught us that fear will lead us to follow in His ways. Does refraining from sin actually motivate us to go positively in His ways?

The sefer Netivot Shalom suggests that our pasuk is teaching us a much deeper kind of fear. When a person does commit a sin, aside from the punishment he might deserve, a blemish is created in his neshamah that creates a spiritual distance between him and Hashem. So fear of Hashem is the ultimate form of FOMO - Fear of Missing Out. It is the fear of losing our close relationship with Hashem. If we don’t want Him to leave us, then not only do we have to avoid sin, but we have to do all the positive mitzvot that will increase our closeness to Him.

If this message is so crucial, then why would the Torah wait until close to the end of the 5th book of the Torah to introduce it? Perhaps we can suggest that Tisha B’av is now behind us and immediately we are guided to think about the Yomim Noraim - the holiest days of the year where much of the focus revolves around Teshuvah and Yirat Hashem. That is why Parashat Eikev which is always read after Tisha B’av is the Parasha to teach us this invaluable lesson. But remember, it is all in your hands. Only you can control your own relationship with Hashem.

Parashat Vaetchanan - A Deeper Understanding of the Yetzer Hara

In this week’s Parasha, we find the source of our most famous prayer, Shema. The famous pasuk of ואהבת את ה׳ אלקך בכל לבבך has so many important lessons and messages. There is one that caught my attention this week.

What does it mean to love Hashem בכל לבבך with all your heart?

Rashi quotes the Gemara in Brachot (54) that it means בשני יצרך, ביצר הטוב וביצר הרע, with both your good and evil inclinations. 

It is straightforward to say that we should use our good inclination to love Hashem, But what could it mean to love Hashem with our evil inclination? Isn’t the role of our evil inclination to distance us from Hashem? It almost seems like an inherent contradiction? 

The sefer Otzrot HaTorah suggests a few answers to this question. Let’s see which one sounds best to you:

1. The Rabbeinu Yonah suggests that the way you fulfill loving Hashem is in fact by doing His mitzvot. So when you do a positive mitzvah, that is an act of loving Hashem. Similarly, by refraining from sin, it is also a fulfillment of loving Hashem. So using your Yetzer Hara means beating and overcoming it - that expresses love for Hashem.
2. The yetzer hatov refers to our positive midot like having mercy on others. But even positive midot have limits and shouldn’t be applied to everyone. Perhaps evil people don’t deserve mercy in some instances. So by not showing mercy in those instances, that use of your “yetzer hara” is an act of loving Hashem.
3. The Rambam says that when a person has a moment of anger or misfortune, the root stems from the yetzer hara and a person has to internalize in that moment and infuse his heart with love of Hashem so he can overcome the challenge of negative feelings or tzarot.
4. One reason Hashem created the yetezr hara in the first place is to give us an opportunity to overcome it and gain reward for maintaining the Torah standards. The Vilna Gaon explains that another reason is that without a yetzer hara, mankind would cease to exist, as we would not have physical desires. We would never desire food to sustain ourselves and we would have no physical desires to procreate and build a family. While the physical desires are needed to maintain us, by controlling our lusts and desires and doing everything לשם שמים, we are expressing our love for Hashem.
5. Perhaps my favorite answer comes from the Ktav Sofer who explains that the yetzer hara is smart. He does not try to get us to jump to extremes. He knows he cannot just convince us to violate Shabbat in public or eat a cheeseburger. He first tries to get us to violate “aveirot kalot - lighter sins,” with the knowledge that once we start sinning our guard will be down. Once we start rationalizing “small” sins, he will move us up the ladder to become less and less sensitive to the mitzvot and eventually perhaps to  violate major sins. The Ktav Sofer explains the message is we need to learn from the yetzer hara and follow this strategy for growing in our avodat Hashem on the positive side. We will never sustain positive growth if we go from zero to 100 in a day. Religious growth that is sustainable has to take place in small, manageable steps. So when Chazal say that we should love Hashem with our yetzer hara, this means we should learn from his strategies to turn it around and use those strategies for religious growth.

Tisha B'Av - Why Are We Still Crying?

Rav Weinberger – Leyl Tisha B’av 2019

Most Sephardic communities have a custom to start by announcing how many years it has been since the churban. I’ve lost track of the number but it has been many years. We are here again. The Jews throughout the world say בכה תבכה בלילה – from that first night of Tisha B’av in the midbar when the meraglim came back from Israel discouraged, the entire nation began to cry a בכיה של חנם – whatever that means. They were worried. Ever since then we are still crying. Tisha B’av is the reminder of where those tears began. But we are still crying for the same reason.

What is that reason?

Unless we are well versed in the gemaras and Rambam Beis Habechira to understand what the korbanos looked like and what it meant to live in a way of tahara, koahnim bavadosim, leviim bshiram uv’zimram, then we don’t really connect to that. What it meant to have prophesy in the world. It is so hard to understand and feel what is missing, what we lost.

Moshe Rabbeinu taught us in Parshas Devarim – the true reason we began crying then and then it intensified by the churban rishon and sheini. Moshe had calmed down a little, a new generation preparing to enter Israel – he asked why did you cry back then and why now.

וַתֵּרָגְנ֤וּ בְאָהֳלֵיכֶם֙ וַתֹּ֣אמְר֔וּ בְּשִׂנְאַ֤ת יְהוָה֙ אֹתָ֔נוּ הוֹצִיאָ֖נוּ מֵאֶ֣רֶץ מִצְרָ֑יִם לָתֵ֥ת אֹתָ֛נוּ בְּיַ֥ד הָאֱמֹרִ֖י לְהַשְׁמִידֵֽנוּ׃

You sulked in your tents and said, “It is because the LORD hates us that He brought us out of the land of Egypt, to hand us over to the Amorites to wipe us out.

When meraglim came back, we were complaining in out tents amongst ourselves – maybe it wasn’t said out loud but there was a feeling of that Hashem hates us and that’s why He took us out of Egypt and began this whole journey.

Ever since then, the underlying cause for our crying (and the whole world) is because of that feeling that Hashem hates us. Not that He doesn’t exist, He does. But He hates me.

עַ֥ל נַהֲר֨וֹת ׀ בָּבֶ֗ל שָׁ֣ם יָ֭שַׁבְנוּ גַּם־בָּכִ֑ינוּ בְּ֝זָכְרֵ֗נוּ אֶת־צִיּֽוֹן׃

By the rivers of Babylon, there we sat, sat and wept, as we thought of Zion.

We were displaced, many Jews killed, homes destroyed, children didn’t know where parents where an parents where the children were. So many reasons to cry. Many of our grandparents know what that was like.

The Zohar in beginning of Shemos explains why – when we went to galus bavel they thought that was the end; the world would end. They thought Hashem abandoned us. The same feeling we had when the meraglim came back. They felt He divorced us. Sent us away and no longer is interested or cares about what happens to us. He doesn’t want us back.

עַ֥ל נַהֲר֨וֹת ׀ בָּבֶ֗ל שָׁ֣ם יָ֭שַׁבְנוּ גַּם־בָּכִ֑ינוּ בְּ֝זָכְרֵ֗נוּ אֶת־צִיּֽוֹן׃

It says it here b’zachreinu es zion – what does it mean? It doesn’t mean b’zacrheinu our children or our food. What does this me,an zion?

By Har Sinai we had our first real taste of zion – still far from yerushalayim, but we tasted Hashem’s love. The whole Shir Hashirim is a description of that love.

יִשָּׁקֵ֙נִי֙ מִנְּשִׁיק֣וֹת פִּ֔יהוּ כִּֽי־טוֹבִ֥ים דֹּדֶ֖יךָ מִיָּֽיִן׃

Oh, give me of the kisses of your mouth, For your love is more delightful than wine.

Rashi says Hashem gave us the Torah and spoke to us panim el panim – there is no greater delight than the love we felt at Har Sinai and Hashem promised us that we will experience that again. That is b’zachreinu es tzion – in the beis hamikdash there was such a feeling. There was songs that levim sang there. Everyone joined in that singing. The songs of Dovid – no one since him ever felt the love of Hashem. But in beis hamikdash no matter what you had seen before you walked in, you felt it when you came in. It was built תוכו רצוף אהבה.  From the day of churban bayis – the heart of Hashem – that love is hidden from us. We look for hints of it, but the אהבת ה׳ אלקינו is hidden.

אתה בחרתנו מכל העמים, אהבת אותנו ורצית בנו ורוממתנו

What does it mean ורוממתנו?        

The meforshim say it means there are not words we could use to express the love Hashem has for us. This was lost when the churban occurred. We feel He forgot us and is disgusted with us.

We feel we don’t hear Dovid Hamelech’s songs. Even if we sing them we don’t connect to them. What is going on in our lives make us feel forgotten?

שָֽׁמְע֥וּ עַמִּ֖ים יִרְגָּז֑וּן חִ֣יל אָחַ֔ז יֹשְׁבֵ֖י פְּלָֽשֶׁת׃

The peoples hear, they tremble; Agony grips the dwellers in Philistia.

Once we are back in the mikdash, the whole world knows the game is over. And our depressed feelings will end. Our not able to focus on davening and learning will end. Once it is clear that the mikdash is back, we will feel Hashem’s love like Har Sinai. When that happens there is nothing that can hold us back from kedusha. No force can stand up against us when we have that confidence in Hashem’s love.

When a child comes from a home where he feels his parents unabating love – he can make it through this world even if the parents passed away years ago. He sees the image of his father or mother. He sees an image of how his father saw him, how he loved you.

Do we understand what it means to grow up without parents? Survivors who lost their parents so young that its hard to remember them. But they remember their love. If they don’t, it is so difficult. It is a difficult galus.

A Poem Written by a 21 year old woman who grew up with many tzarot, she did not have loving parents and went through many difficulties.

G-d – my brain is hurting. My head is spinning as I sit here numb from pain. It feels so unreal. Dizziness overtakes as I think about You. I think about Your actions. Your thoughts and my limited understanding. I can’t comprehend, I don’t understand.  But I don’t ask. I don’t ask why. Why my family? Why my friends? Why my marriage? Why the abuse? I am not questioning. Not asking for reason to explain what I have gone through. But I have one question- Tatty, why don’t I feel You when I am being broken, when I am being shattered? When I am being crushed? Why do you only allow me to feel You when I am surrounded by the right people? When in the right community when being inspired when easy to connect to you. Why is it when darkness falls, when nightmares start and hell begins that You fall away. That You hide yourself in unknown places. That my trust in You falters. Tatty, I want You. I want to feel you. I want to love you. Not only when all is going good. I want to feel when I am in a pile of broken bones with no energy to get back up. I want to feel You at night when my world is black. When I am tossing and turning and the tears flow. I want to feel You are beside me. When my friends give me 20 minutes notice before committing suicide. I want to know You will catch them. I want your presence to be clear, to be transparent so I can see You. I know You are there with me with every step, but I don’t just want the knowledge, I want to know and feel it in my heart and mind. I want to reach for Your hand and for You to lead me through. Tatty, I’ve stopped moving backwards, I’ve stopped going into my past, I’ve  stop trying to change my past; I am moving towards the future. I am no longer angry for what I have gone through. I don’t need You to take away the pain. I don’t need you to change my home. I don’t need you to take revenge on those that hurt me. Tatty, all I am asking is to give me Your hand, to hold on tight, to never let go. So I can feel You and love You without imagining Your presence.  Give me Your hand so we can walk hand in hand, side by side because walking together in the dark with you is better than walking alone in the light.

This girl doesn’t know it but all she is asking for is Binyan Beit Hamikdash. Nachamu Nachamu Ami – the nechama is when we hear from Hashems mouth Ami – You are my people. That is all we need to hear.

"הֲשִׁיבֵנוּ ה אֵלֶיךָ וְנָשׁוּבָה חַדֵּשׁ יָמֵינוּ כְּקֶדֶם"

Shabbat Chazon: Why the Beit Hamikdash Was Destroyed

מִֽי־הָאִ֤ישׁ הֶֽחָכָם֙ וְיָבֵ֣ן אֶת־זֹ֔את וַאֲשֶׁ֨ר דִּבֶּ֧ר פִּֽי־יְהוָ֛ה אֵלָ֖יו וְיַגִּדָ֑הּ עַל־מָה֙ אָבְדָ֣ה הָאָ֔רֶץ נִצְּתָ֥ה כַמִּדְבָּ֖ר מִבְּלִ֖י עֹבֵֽר׃ וַיֹּ֣אמֶר יְהוָ֔ה עַל־עָזְבָם֙ אֶת־תּ֣וֹרָתִ֔י אֲשֶׁ֥ר נָתַ֖תִּי לִפְנֵיהֶ֑ם וְלֹא־שָׁמְע֥וּ בְקוֹלִ֖י וְלֹא־הָ֥לְכוּ בָֽהּ׃ (ירמיהו ט:יא-יב)

What man is so wise That he understands this? To whom has Hashem’s mouth spoken, So that he can explain it: Why is the land in ruins, Laid waste like a wilderness, With none passing through? Hashem replied: Because they forsook the Teaching I had set before them. They did not obey Me and they did not follow it.

The Gemara (Nedarim 81a) asks why the Beit Hamikdash was destroyed and the land left desolate? None of the sages or prophets could explain it until Hashem Himself revealed through the pesukim above in Yermiyahu that it was because the Jewish people forsook the Torah, which means that they failed to properly recite the Birchot HaTorah.

Let’s consider a few questions:

1. Rabbeinu Yonah wonders why this was not known to the sages and prophets? 
2. Furthermore, we know that the Gemara in Yoma says that the first Beit Hamikdash was destroyed because of immorality, murder and idolatry. So why does Yirmiyahu say it was destroyed only because of the failure to recite bircas HaTorah? 
3. Moreover, the pasuk says they “didn’t listen to the me and follow the Torah,” how did Yirmiyahu know that meant they didn’t recite bircas HaTorah?

Rabbeinu Yonah has a deep insight where he explains that the generation did learn a lot of Torah and kept the mitzvot. That is why the sages did not recognize that they had forsaken the Torah. But then how did they end up violating the three cardinal sins? Didn’t their learning protect them? To this Hashem says that they neglected to say the brachot on the Torah.

Rav Zev Leff in his book Outlooks and Insights explains that Hashem wants us to have a constant awareness of His presence and to emulate His ways. All 613 mitzvot are intended to be expressions of our belief in Him. But we cannot relate to Him without His words being broken down into segments we can deal with individually. Each mitzvah is like a separate window that allows us to get a glimpse of Hashem. So there is more to mitzvot than the physical actions they each contain. The goal of mitzvot is to help us understand Hashem and to shape our personality, outlook and actions. This was the problem with the generation of the churban habayit - they learned Torah and did mitzvot, but they did so in a superficial way, not understanding or appreciating how it was to impact them. They performed them by rote, but did not allow the messages to pierce their hearts.

With this Rabbi Leff suggests that the pasuk above says, “They forsook My Torah” - not the Torah, but My Torah. They did the mitzvot, but they did not hear Hashem’s deeper messages expressed in the Torah - ולא שמעו בקולי. There are three birchot HaTorah: 1. אשר קדשנו במצותיו - the generation failed to appreciate that mitzvot are meant to make us holy. 2. The second bracha says the purpose of the Torah is to make us יודעי שמך, those who emulate Hashem. 3. אשר בחר בנו מכל העמים - Hashem chose us to be the holy nation and model to the other nations of the world. In other words, the birchot HaTorah teach us the implications of what it means to learn Torah and fulfill the mitzvot properly. 

The message seems clear for us. If we want to rebuild the Beit Hamikdash in our days, we need to observe the mitzvot properly and completely. We need to accept all of them sincerely and recognize how they will bring us closer to Hashem and to become better people.

Why We Cry on Tisha B'av?

רב שמשון דוד פינקוס – דף קפז

על אלה אני בוכיה

השפע הגשמי שיש בדורנו, נגנב מאתנו במקום השפע הרוחני

The avodah on Tisha B’av is to cry. Why are we crying? We know we cry for the generations of tzarot, which are all an extension of the churban bayit. But what is the avodah of crying?

Before the churban, there was a constant שפע that Hashem placed in the world, and it was a flow of גשמיות that flowed into the world for the Jews. As a result, the non-Jews benefited from the flow, but it was placed here for us. We used to come to the mikdash to eat korbanot and for aliya l’regel and from that emanated רוח הקודש ונבואה. But that was all lost with the churban. In our times, the שפע comes into the world and the non-Jews take it, leaving us the leftover. Moreover, during the times of the mikdash, the non-Jews fed off our extra שפע, but now they feed off of our tzarot.

How does this שפע come into the world? Only through our tefillot. When a father sees his child on the floor begging for help, he listens to him. When he sees him bleeding, even more so. Tisha B’av is for tefilla and crying – Hashem, look at all the tzarot, all the blood lost, etc. Please redeem us.

Our challenge is that we can feel the tzarot, but we don’t feel the missing שפע that the non-Jews are now enjoying. We don’t know what we are missing. We are supposed to be crying on Tisha B’av for the loss of this שפע. But  we don’t know what we are missing – that is why we cry; we cry for not knowing what we are really missing.

There is a story of a man who picked up a package at the post office and it contained 10 rubels; he was so happy, it was the talk of the town. But later it became known that this man’s uncle sent him 100 rubels, but the mailman stole the other 90. Our simcha for our spirituality today is like the man who was happy about getting 10 rubels. We do have good things, but we are missing the 90%. Yes, there we learn Torah, do Mitzvot and Pray, but is are we doing it with 100% or 90% focus on the , or are we thinking about the other good things in life?

We have to cry on Tisha B’av that we want to learn with better focus, pray with better intensity and take more time to do mitzvot properly. We have to maintain our lofty goals and not give in and compromise to the complacency of our society. Recognize what we are missing – that is why we cry on Tisha B’av.

Parashat Matot-Masei: Don't Let Your Prayers Go to Waste

אִישׁ֩ כִּֽי־יִדֹּ֨ר נֶ֜דֶר לַֽיהוָ֗ה אֽוֹ־הִשָּׁ֤בַע שְׁבֻעָה֙ לֶאְסֹ֤ר אִסָּר֙ עַל־נַפְשׁ֔וֹ לֹ֥א יַחֵ֖ל דְּבָר֑וֹ כְּכָל־הַיֹּצֵ֥א מִפִּ֖יו יַעֲשֶֽׂה׃

If a man makes a vow to the LORD or takes an oath imposing an obligation on himself, he shall not break his pledge; he must carry out all that has crossed his lips.

This week’s Parasha begins with a focus on speech. Sometimes we do not connect how our speech impacts our spirituality and on the person we are as a whole. Many commentators take advantage of this week’s Parasha to try and inspire us to focus more on our speech. We also know that often the Parashiyot connect to the time of the year and, therefore, there must be a connection to the Bein Hametzarim - Three Weeks that we are now in.

Rav Avraham Schorr reminds us that in the world of Korbanot and Kodshim brought in the Beit Hamikdash, it is our speech that infuses regular animals or items with kedusha. As the Sfat Emet says on our Pasuk in this Parasha, “he shall not break his pledge,” means that שלא יעשה דבריו חולין - you should not make your words mundane. This implies that by default our words are holy and we can do holy things with them. Rav Schorr also says that now we understand why we read this Parasha during the Three Weeks. The root of all the sins that led to the destruction of the Beit Hamikdash was the lack of controlling our speech. The Chofetz Chaim in his introduction to Shmirat HaLashon that the foundation of Sinat Chinam is lashon hara. Therefore, during these three weeks we need to be especially careful with guarding our speech.

We know that it is speech that distinguishes human beings from animals. If we consider that carefully, we find that our speech has huge ramifications on the person we become. We can either learn to guard our mouths from lashon hara, obscenities and profanities and elevate ourselves, or G-d forbid the opposite. 

Many of us have all been taught this before and it does not always motivate us to make consistent changes in how we speak. So I want to suggest another strategy. Rav Schorr brings earlier sources that teach us that how we speak impacts our prayer. We know the value of prayer and we put a lot of effort and kavana into them. The commentators metaphorically say that when a person speaks lashon hara or with profanities it creates a thick cloud between us and the heavens that prevents our prayers from reaching Hashem. But there are different types of bad speech. One one level the clouds prevent our tefillot from reaching the heavens, but if we try hard enough and pour tears into our prayers we can crack a hole in the clouds and our prayers can reach the heavens. But there are just some words that cannot be rectified. Certain speech is so bad that the clouds block our prayers completely from reaching the heavens.

To me, the part that hits home, is the need for our tefillot to be effective and the fact that our speech can really hold us back. Unfortunately, many of us only put the emphasis on our prayers and not on the rest of how we speak. Let us all learn the lesson of this Parasha and hope that it will contribute to rebuilding the Beit Hamikdash so that this year we celebrate Tisha B’av in Yerushalyim.